Stand-up don't get no respect - it's the hardest thing to do in show business. You don't have no band and there's no music.
Business
I have snakes, three sharks, moray eels, piranhas, five scorpions and a bird spider. All of them are predators. They are dangerous but it's cool to have strong and powerful pets.
Power
I have snakes, three sharks, moray eels, piranhas, five scorpions and a bird spider. All of them are predators. They are dangerous but it's cool to have strong and powerful pets.
Cool
The most romantic thing I ever did to my woman? I painted her toenails!
Painting
Being funny wasn't a career choice growing up, it was my way out of situations; a way to survive another day.
Funny
Being funny wasn't a career choice growing up, it was my way out of situations; a way to survive another day.
Growing
My sense of humor is a turkey, and I pull it out of the oven and baste it in reality.
Reality
The most romantic thing I ever did to my woman? I painted her toenails!
Romantic
Stand-up don't get no respect - it's the hardest thing to do in show business. You don't have no band and there's no music.
Respect
People live too much of their lives on email or the Internet or text messages these days. We're losing all of our communication skills.
Communication
My sense of humor is a turkey, and I pull it out of the oven and baste it in reality.
Humor
People live too much of their lives on email or the Internet or text messages these days. We're losing all of our communication skills.
Internet